Return of Manic Monday.

Completing the set: Manic Monday by the Bangles meets Return of the Jedi



Click on this to hear the music in a new window

A twin-sun dawn already,
and we're right
in the middle of the scene,
Look, there's two robots
at the front-door
of a palace,
somewhere on
Tattoine,

But they're both made slaves,
because the Hutt
is not a reasonable man.



He captures Leia:
not-to-worry,
'cause Skywalker
is the man with a plan:



Yes Lucas made another Starwars (oh-uh-woah)
For filling up the Toy Stores (oh-uh-woah)
Directing's been out-sourced (Marquand)
The prequels were far worse (oh-uh-woah)
(Than when) Lucas made another Starwars



So every-one
es-capes'n'Jabba dies,
'n' Luke goes back
to Yoda
to train,

It turns out Leia
is his sister,
And we have the whole:
"related?!" again.



And also-
There's another
Death Star.
With a hole in it,

Do I really care?



I think it's pretty
safe to say
that the plot's
been already there



Yes Lucas made another Starwars (oh-uh-woah)
He's filling up the Toy Stores(oh-uh-woah)
The directing's been out-sourced ( Marquhahand )
The prequels were far worse(oh-uh-woah)
(Than when) Lucas made another Starwars

Why of all films,
why could not Lucas
not have left
these
three alone?

(left them, a-lone)

It can't be dough:
The fucking bastard must be rolling:
all the shit he owns,

I just honestly cant say what's worse...

The prequels or Greedo firing first

( Bang, bang, bang, bang!)



But tweaking is fun (when you’ve no ideas)...



Yes Lucas made another Starwars(oh-uh-woah)
It's filling up the Toy Stores(oh-uh-woah)
Directing's been out-sourced(oh-uh-woah)
The prequels were far worse(oh-uh-woah)
(Yeah) Lucas made another Starwars(oh-uh-woah)
It's filling up the Toy Stores(oh-uh-woah)
Directing's been out-sourced(oh-uh-woah)
The prequels were far worse(oh-uh-woah)

(Than when) Lucas made another StarWars.

The Empire strikes an Eternal Flame

As one thing leads to another...




Click on this to hear the music in a new window ( There maybe an ad on first)

VERSE1

Close your eyes
open your mind,

Jedi



do hear how I'm speakin'?
Yoda will explain ,
I dont
speak plain,
I speak Kinda freakeh...
lackwards banguage
all the time,

speak I .

VERSE2

That is why
explain do I
to you,
in this arse-about face way,
talk like this I do,
to screw
with you
I speak Kinda freakeh...
lackwards banguage
all the time,

speak I .

CHORUS



Hurting brain,
Never speaking plain,
Yoda's way,
it is when,
Jedi he must train,
So it is that
lackwards banguage,
all the time

speak I....

NEXT

A New Hope of Walking Like an Egyptian

Wrote this a few months ago: thought I might as well stick it 'ere...

Okay:Click on this to hear the music in a new window

Ahem!

(to the tune of 'Walk Like An Egyptian' by The Bangles then)



All the Tusken raiders,

on the plains:

They do the sand-dance

dontcha know,

in single file,

ohwayo!

They're leaving, but

they'll be back with mo'.

Tiny jawas drive-

a giant skip,
around the place,

looking out for scrap,

They'll sell you droids

oooteeeny!

( thay're stolen or

just completely crap)

Jawa guys

with the glowing eyes say,

way oh

way ooh

way oh-oh

way oooh!

Got what you're looking for.

Master Luke is so-

sick of life,

He wants to join

- the rebellion,

His Dads alive!

No way! oh...

( That isn't what

folks are tellin him,)

Stormtroopers waste-

all his kin,

And so he must

go- with Obi Wan,

He's got the force..

Oh way oh..

And that's why the

troop-ers wave them on.

Obi Wan:

He just his moves hand,

 says

way oh

way ooh

way oh-oh

way ohh!

not what you're looking for

instrumental break and 'whistling' bit

They hire a ship

- in a bar,

but some of the

custom-ers are rude,

Obi chops 'em up,

No way! Oh..

Kenobi's a

bad-ass fighting dude,

Han Solo takes-

on the job,

And thats 'cos he-

needs the money fast,

He meets Greedo,

Oh way oh,

He shoots at him,

Greedo has a blast.

Han solo
'pays for the mess',
And gets away,
with this felony,

no-one seems to mind
('bout Greedo!)
They live in a hive,
of villainy.






 Straight away

to the docking bay and..

way oh

way ooh

way oh-oh

way ohh!

Set course for Alderaan.

Set course for Alderaan.

NEXT

The bottle to act responsibly.

There was a time, back when I were a gorsoon, that you could bring the bottles of some soft drinks back to the shop and receive money for them from the shop-owner.
I must have been quite young when this practice stopped but I do remember it.

For quite some time afterwards all bottles were emblazoned with the words 'No Deposit- No Return' to hammer the point home that the days of "finding a discarded bottle and turning one man's trash into another man's bag-of-sweeties" were truly over.

That old system went the way of the buggy-whip. Glass-recycling hasn't ended mind you, but now we have Bottle-banks where every right-thinking citizen disposes of their surplus glassware and gets to benefit charities, like Rehab So I suppose you could say that people are paid in 'environmental charity-supporting smug points' instead of money.

I think the money was better: 'environmentally-conscious charity-supporting smug points' are only of value to a certain section of the population whereas everybody loves money.



I think there was a shift in thinking somewhere along the line. With the deposit/return system everybody had a reason to recycle and the that reason was self-interest. It required no training in the importance of sustainability to get children to recycle, it wasn't laid on the head of each individual to
" do the right thing": there was a system there to ensure the right thing was done.

It's just another way of operating.




Speaking of other ways of operating; in Finland, they didn't get rid of the "Deposit/Return" system, they refined it.

I cannot explain what it was like, as a regular visitor to stinking Irish Car-park Bottle-banks, I cant explain what it was like to enter a shop, every shop that sold
bottles and cans, and find a clean and beautiful machine that you just popped your bottles and cans into. I cant explain it. I felt like a Caveman who'd been defrosted and woke up in the future.



Watching the machine read the barcode and sort the recycling ( as the digital total of my deposit money rose on the display ) was staggering.


The shop-owners ( who make a living distributing receptacles in glass and aluminium ) had never passed on responsibility to the customer, but instead dealt with recycling as part of their business.



About six months ago, a bright plastic Bottle-bank was put in place at the top of Wolf Tone Street and was promptly burnt down to an ugly black smudge by 'the youth of today' because 'environmentally-conscious charity-supporting smug points' are of no value to them.

Their actions would hardly be described as responsible: but, to my mind, the fault is in the system: were the shops to accept their responsibility for what they sell and adopt the Finnish model then there'd be no ugly plastic Bottle-banks and the 'youth-of-today' would have a solid reason to clean-up after cider-parties.

A reason that has nothing to do with abstract notions like ' saving the planet' and everything to do with self-interest.