tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5297306090706424134.post2164839661828207181..comments2023-08-15T02:21:46.775-07:00Comments on Things and Also Stuff...: Tom Collins is dead, Long live Tom Collins'sUnknownnoreply@blogger.comBlogger4125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5297306090706424134.post-46967374920494884062011-01-04T12:30:36.018-08:002011-01-04T12:30:36.018-08:00Here is thefollow up.Here is the<a href="http://stuffinthangs.blogspot.com/2010/12/toms-ii-re-opening.html" rel="nofollow">follow up</a>.Darren Maherhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00035977231087809840noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5297306090706424134.post-28186245558176164182010-12-09T07:37:34.306-08:002010-12-09T07:37:34.306-08:00A ditty by Mick Hanley
The Scourge of the Nation ...A ditty by Mick Hanley<br /><br />The Scourge of the Nation (to be sung acapella like)<br />-----------------------------------------------<br /><br />Verse 1.<br />Good countrymen all who are fond of a ball <br />Of malt or the gin or a pint of good stout<br />For a long time you know to a bar you could go<br />And imbibe in them all ‘til your brain it gave out<br />In two minutes flat you were sure to find chat<br />You were welcome to strike up a bar of a song<br />For chat with the boys tall stories and lies<br />You went down to your local you couldn’t go wrong.<br /><br />Verse 2.<br />But sad this cantation the scourge of the nation <br />More deadly than darts and far worse than the pool <br />Has every man-jack with his jaw hanging slack <br />His porter forgot his arse stuck to the stool<br />His tongue without wag and his mouth round a fag<br />His fingernails gone bitten down to the core<br />Through smoke thick and thin he’ll sit with a grin <br />And watch the oul box ‘til his eyeballs are sore.<br /><br />Verse 3.<br />From Cork up to Derry in bars they make merry <br />When Bibi that beauty appears on the screen<br />They’re stuck into Neighbours, Glenroe, and bejapers<br />Professional wrestlers the Pope and the Queen<br />Anne Doyle all the while their hearts does beguile <br />The cards get confused and the trumps are mislaid<br />No tune on the fiddle no pipes or fal-diddle<br />They’re all pushed aside now to watch the Late-Late.<br /><br />Verse 4. <br />There’s no more conversation on who’ll run the nation<br />The economy’s crisis or the next hurling match<br />‘Tis discussed on the telly each man fills his belly<br />And argue he won’t he’s content for to watch<br />And what’s more insulting from all this resulting <br />Your call for a drink is completely ignores<br />For the barman the yob has forgotten his job <br />He’s glued to the box while your pint’s still unpoured.<br /><br />Verse 5.<br />So proprietors all please pay heed to my call <br />And get rid of your carpets and mock leather seats <br />Throw out the oul box and replenish your stocks <br />For ‘tis great the demands you’ll be called on to meet<br />Put a sign on your door saying porter galore<br />No Telly, No Pool, but the best of oul jar<br />All night you’ll be filling and the crowds they’ll be milling<br />For the pleasure of swilling a pint in your bar.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5297306090706424134.post-29536341239112581332010-12-01T06:43:38.212-08:002010-12-01T06:43:38.212-08:00At the very least.At the very least.Darren Maherhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00035977231087809840noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5297306090706424134.post-38247374937174547372010-11-30T15:44:33.221-08:002010-11-30T15:44:33.221-08:00Does this mean I'm gonna have to pay a visit a...Does this mean I'm gonna have to pay a visit and place the submarine on the wall again?Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com